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I'm Canadian, therefore:

-my furniture is largely formed from treestumps
-I drink sap instead of water.
-I have a pair of dress snow shoes and work snow shoes
-I play games from an oil powered laptop
-I have a seal farm
-I ski to school
-What's a toilet?
-At any point in my day I have a risk of falling through ice.
-I'd prefer a snowball fight then getting laid..any day.
-Eh is our question mark.
-Only we know how to use eh.
-eh.
-Everything is more expensive.
-Moose are to us what a dog is to an American.
-We are not allowed to use stoves for fear of melting our homes.
-We use "oh yeah" like Russel Oliver except it's cool when we do it.
-We can drink at 18.
-We can drive at 15.
-We invented hockey therefore...
-The world juniors were rigged.
-We can get sick all we want and it's free.
-If I don't like having a penis, the necessary surgery is free.
-We're not part of a redneck agenda. [I'M NOT A GREENDAY FAN]
-Our platform does not consist of wiping the Middle East.
-We are loved by all places on the Earth except Berkshire Country.
-Berkshire County should keep better tabs on its citizens.
-We are never wrong, the only time we were wrong was one time when we thought we were wrong but turned out to be right.
-No matter what we do, we end up being the ones to receive the apologies.
-Our elections make sense.
-Our population knows how to vote.
-We don't have to worry about Mexicans smuggling drugs.
-We don't have to worry about Mexicans.
-NO ONE has the last name Hicks.
-Don't like the above statement?
-Then you are Mike Hicks.
-Americans don't know it, but we make a hell of a basketball player.
-I must act over patriotic.